To Tracey

Submitted by Hope UK (United Kingdom), Jan 26, 2020 at 08:07

My ex husband was Kurdish and told me he did not want to live in the UK. He obviously did. Only you will be able to make the decision on how you proceed with this. My ex left me a few years ago now so I am way down the line, recovered and happy. What I would say it was an immense amount of heartache / stress. Do I have any regrets in life, no! but if I had to have one it would be that experience. As I have said many times before on this site it is the deceit and betrayal that they and their family were all in on it - a very hard pill to swallow when you are a "normal" genuine person. My ex had someone in the background all the time and fathered a child whilst he was with me. They will invest the time in you irrespective of what is going on in their "real" life because there is a plan and it normally ends in heartbreak for the woman and a visa / indefinite leave to remain to the UK. Sorry to be so pessimistic but.........I speak from experience. As for the gold thing I do not know because we did not go for the whole shebang - I did not want all that but it is clear now why we didn't because it was not a "real" relationship. It was a means to an end and I was used as a pawn. All an illusion and a chapter in my life that fortunately has not defined me. There is happiness after heartbreak but it makes you less trusting. Good luck.

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