Advice to reader Brian

Submitted by Prashant (United States), Oct 22, 2019 at 20:57

Dear Dr Pipes, Your reader Brian is in love with a Muslim woman but does not think very highly of Islam. He does not know what to do and asked for advice. It is indeed a difficult situation. First, if he does not think very highly of Islam, I would certainly advise him to not change his opinion just because he has fallen in love. Second, if her condition for partnership is that he should convert to Islam, then it is a complete no, no and no. That leads to my third point. Assuming that she is in absolute love with him also --in theory-- Brian can ask her to convert to Christianity. Boy that will be a disaster. I think Islam's insistence that for marriage to be valid the non-Muslim must convert, is immoral and selfish. And I cannot Brian to do the reverse.

I think the only right solution is that Brian discusses with the woman that he loves her but he wont convert and he has some serious objections to Islam. If she does a principled conversion out of Islam, we may have a deal here. If Brian develops a principled liking for Islam, that might be another way to have a deal. Finally, if she agrees to remain a Muslim and let Brian remain a Christian and both show enough maturity, then that is a deal as well (That is how modernity and education will reach Islam. That is the best way and our best hope.) Finally, the woman's three Muslim children. Well, she has every right to raise them as Muslims. Hope she raises them as decent open-minded humans. Brian has an opportunity to play a role there.

Humanity's best hope is that Islam becomes unselfish, democratic, and open minded. That is all what we are trying to do.

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