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Submitted by Amber, May 14, 2017 at 00:52

Thank you very much to those who took the time to comment on my post and share with me and wish me well. I am 28 years old, to clarify. He told me he was 24, but I recently got confirmation that he was actually 23, which was just another stupid lie among all others. I am ex-military, have done police work in that field, and have spent time previously in other more hostile Muslim countries. Morocco didn't seem quite so extreme, in comparison. I guess that made me feel a little more at ease with everything. I'm just a person who believes in letting people show you what their place is in your life, with time. I didn't want to be that person who judged someone before I gave anything a chance. I'm sure a lot of us have felt that way. We're all hoping for that one person who will show us they are different than everyone else. But in these cases, the surprise is truly on us.

Since I have posted, he has continued to try to contact me in every way possible. Skype, personal email addresses, everything. The Facebook and Instagram were shut down, but not before he really tried to tear me apart by telling me some of the WORST things anyone has ever said to me, to include, 'you miscarried your first child because you were going to be a terrible mother,' and, 'you should have died in the war (Afghanistan).' I guess even if you never actually had a child, you can still be attacked for the assumption of being a bad mother. Interesting how they all attack us in the same ways. Anyway, the veil is completely off on this idiot and my heart is so hard toward him that I could never feel anything good about him again. Now I'm just frustrated with myself for allowing it to continue that far. The thing that really got me before was that, even when there were fights, there was always a feeling of deep sincerity in the things he would say. You really get to thinking maybe you can help them grow up and be better men, but it just doesn't happen.

We were probably about six months into our relationship when I first found this site. I was FLOORED because the problems other women listed here were like clockwork with him. Like, seriously, in the EXACT same sequence. It really shook me inside and helped me to start questioning more and getting closer to cutting everything off.

Do your research, ask questions, follow those gut feelings, and don't ever be afraid to leave and start over again. They love to tell you that you know you will never find a man that loves you as they did, and that is true. The truth is you can find someone who loves you a LOT differently and a LOT better. Their empty words and promises are not enough for any of us.

Thanks again for the well-wishes, and good luck on all of your individual journeys to recovery.

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