Response to Lani on Advice, British Woman, Moroccan Man, Marriage, Immigration

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Aug 2, 2019 at 14:36

Hi Lani:

Thanks for sharing your story. First, I appreciate the honesty that you can see neither party is perfect in any relationship, but you can also start thinking that this is always your fault and something must be wrong with you.

The bossiness he seems to have is perhaps partly cultural. As one of our former frequent posters used to say "it's very much a man's world over there".

My advice to women who are already married is that she needs to read through this forum and (with the help of other useful resources) ultimately figure out if the marriage was real from the beginning. If not, then I would advise an annulment. So some questions would be:

1) How did you meet?

2) How long did you date or get to know each other before getting married?

3) Did he ask for money/say I love you early on?

4) Did he seem distracted a lot before the marriage while in the relationship?

5) Did you notice any suspicious activity on social media or dating sites, or as you already have seen, on his phone?

6) Is there a big age difference?

Also, if you are being abused in any way, Lani, then it's time to go stay with someone else or find a woman's shelter.

A big red flag here is him going out, not telling you, and getting other women's numbers. That's an indicator of a scam as he really doesn't seem to care. And I would not count on immigration officers figuring this out for you.

So, all in all, Lani, I think you need to take a good, hard look where you are at.

As such, I hope that you feel welcome on here and will post as you feel you need to. I'm sure that a lot of people on here would be happy to offer insight to help.

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