Avoid mena men at all cost

Submitted by Soraya (United Kingdom), Jul 6, 2017 at 21:43

My story.

My husband left me and while in the depth of despair I decided to go on holiday to Essaouira Morocco on my own. I needed space and change. I am a Muslim myself, with a highly educated successful career and not bad looking. 

Met a guy who had a jewellery shop but did not meet him whilst out there but we stayed in touch once I came back to the uk.

He was travelling in France to various artisan fairs and I met with him several times. All was amazing and it was perfect. Accept it was not. IOn our first meeting he asked me for money while I was getting in my taxi pleading he was broke. Yes stupidly I gave it to him. It became a pattern over the next 3 visits. Yes I should have stopped this after the first meeting. What was wrong with me? I have never given man money before. A man has never asked me to. I fell for his sob story.

I then met him twice in Essaouira twice. All the right words and got taken to all the expensive places, all at my expense of course, even met his family. Even those in Agadir.

It was the second visit to Essaouira that cracks began to show. Why? Because I had deliberately not taken too much money. I wanted to see what he would do. He left me with nothing to the point that I could not even buy a bottle of water for myself, also my gold jewellery went missing. Thid was blamed on friend he had just met but invited to the house,

His demeaner and attitude was like chalk and cheese from the previous visit. He became unkind. He finished with me over some minor comment I made but then said sorry. But still very jealous and possessive even though he finished with me. At the airport he said he still loved me. Of course the pressure to get married was always ever oresent. I told him I did not want to get married and if he and I were to have s life together it would be in Morocco not in the uk. This of course was fine but then it was up to me to buy a place and a 'nice' car for him!!!! Oh yeah and give him money to start a business. Yeah all the familiar bullshit now I realise.

It's cookie cutter stuff I realise now that I have read forum,

On my return we went from texting dozens of time and calling dozens of times to hardly any texts or calls. I felt like I was being kept warm whilst he was spending his efforts elsewhere on another woman. And what the hell is it with these guys? They party all night and sleep all day, every day. He continued to tell me he loved me during the very few and short calls.

I was due to go and see him again in August but I was not happy the way the previous trip went or the way he was behaving now so I asked him out right if I should come over. He said yes of course but when I mentioned I had no spending money he got annoyed. Yes I was testing him!!!!
His lies are more obvious and the more lies I discover the more abrupt and unkind he becomes, His acting skills have also seem to have lost their polish. Funny that!!! He obviously has a new target.

I have now decided that he or any mena man is not for me. I rather be on my own. This was the last thing I needed after my break up with my husband which was only 6 months ago, I met him 4 months ago. Yes I was vulnerable then but I am not now. Time to move on and find a nice man from my own country. He treated me like a western woman and wanted the trappings that went with this. I am am older then him though even though I don't look older then him. Before me he was dating a 18 year Moroccan girl 12 years younger then him for 3 years.

They want wealth from us to give their families a better life and then marry a young girl from their counties. We are a means to an end and nothing more. I know this but I know I will have weak moments and it is during these times that I need to stay extra strong.

Ladies do not let them scam you. it is just that a scam.
I would be grateful for any moral support from this forum.

Thank you
Soraya

---

Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".