Wait and see...

Submitted by Shömi (United States), Apr 3, 2017 at 11:57

Dear Healing Heart,

It's been almost three years for me and I still get sentimental at times... There is nothing wrong with it. It's perfectly normal for a healthy mind to try and make sense of things we experienced in life.

When separating from mine I simply chose to follow my instincts vs emotional attachment. I consciously left behind many sweet memories and no regrets. I reached the point when I had to become aware the dynamic would change once we decided to live together, depending on one another, making sacrifices. I have always been comfortable within my own space, and honestly I found long distance/my own terms kind of situation much more tempting than the horror perspective of marriage. "What ifs" were hunting me regardless ever since. Over years I stayed in touch and on good terms with my ex. Sometimes I was tempted to go back, and yet the most effective remedy came directly from him. His FB account has been filling up with new female friends, often 20+ years older then me (and him). Not all of them are discreet, and many indicated some kind of closer relation to him. My ex, whom I once considered a free spirit, now transformed into Gaddafi. Decorated in ridiculously flashy outfits, sunglasses at all times, like a damn peacock. He now writes his posts in English, haha. He sold his soul.

Give yourself time Healing Heart. He will show true colors if he hasn't shown enough yet. I signed up to five different classes at my local gym, so I can sweat this silliness out of my system. Think of what is best for your wellbeing and invest your energy there. Even when it's done mechanically, you won't regret it later :)

Much Love,
Shömi

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