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Asked to be a second wife

Reader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men

Submitted by Jennifer (United States), Mar 19, 2017 at 21:57

I met a 33 year old Syrian man through his uncle and brothers. Through his family, I knew that he was married to an 18 year old girl back home and had a baby daughter. He was waiting for his immigrant visa to bring them to the U.S. I am also 33 years old and a young widow with a daughter, so I felt sympathetic towards him. Plus, he's gorgeous, as they all are.

We saw each other three times where we were surrounded by his family, and only exchanged basic niceties. During our fourth time together, he asked his family to leave him alone with me, and he professed his love, said he was divorcing his wife, wanted to be with me, etc, etc. I calmly told him that I had a boyfriend, and he had a wife, who he loved, and we couldn't be together. The next time I saw his brothers, he completely ignored me, which was fine. The next time I saw him, he had a new proposal that he stay with his wife, and I be his American girlfriend until she got here. I once again turned him down. He got my number from his uncle and began to message me on Whatsapp.

He sent the sweetest stuff...every morning, he would greet me; he would text me sweet things at work; he would video chat with me until he went to sleep. Thankfully, I read this blog after his first marriage proposal, so I was careful to guard my heart. After two months of chatting, I arranged for us to spend a weekend together. I know, it's adultery, and I'm a terrible person. Anyway, he honestly wasn't that great in bed, even though he was surprisingly well-endowed. I have no idea what was going on with the kissing. It was bad.

The next time I saw him after our weekend of sin, he told me that he would have to marry me because of his religion. I told him that I would absolutely not marry an already married man or a man without an immigrant visa. We planned another weekend together, but my daughter was sick, and I had to cancel. He gave me the silent treatment for a few days, and I decided to end the affair today.

Had I not read the comments on this blog prior to our blossoming "friendship," I fear what I might have done. Even though I knew the intent behind his actions, I still fell quickly into his trap.

Be careful, ladies! It's not just Egyptians and Algerians.

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Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".

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