Loose Thoughts

Submitted by Shömi (United States), Sep 11, 2016 at 18:59

Forgive me guys.
I always felt there is people more qualified to post here, but today I just need to vent. First of all, I love this forum. Straight Talk Luigi, Cynthia, Hope, Chumpita, it's just a few of many I would like to personally thank for being here on the worst of my days. Negative is the reason that brought us here, but you had nothing but positive message for me. I'm surprised scammers never picked up the dialog, but the way I see it, there is an ongoing problem between us and them. The myths surrounding the forum lately is what made me want to respond:

I don't hate Muslims. I don't hate anyone really and I look at people as individuals. As a matter of fact as an artist I've been greatly influenced by Islamic art and culture. I spent about 6 months traveling alone through small towns of Morocco. I don't claim I know it well. But I stay close with Moroccan families I met on the way, my Moroccan relatives and a few Lebanese girls I collaborate with on projects. It's been wonderful, dependable relations. Not to be tainted by one bad apple. For those who happened to disregard the existence of Muslim women, beware. They tend to be confident, well educated, sensual, caring. True to their values. Way ahead of their men. Your Muslim boyfriends telling you that local girls are worthless and greedy, it's like them saying "I drive a 1978 Fiat because I hate new Ferraris". It's a lie. And the old Fiat is you :(

I am neither old nor fat. Being raised in Eastern Europe I learned how to distinguish scammers early. I can divide them into categories and subcategories even. (Observer described it perfectly just a few posts ago.) Mine was what I call a "wishful thinker" (believing his own lies). He never truly understood our world nor the true value of our money, but as it turned out, he wanted his share. What destroyed him, his country, my former country and the reputation of western people altogether was sex tourism. By sex tourists I mean a group of undesirable, often perverted, vulgar people who contributed to prostitution, pedophilia and greed all around the 3rd world. They will never share their stories on here, so please be assured we are not them. We are the victims as well. And in my humble opinion we are as different as it gets. Logically, it requires plenty of well founded confidence for the scam victim to be unsuspicious of a sudden attraction coming from a good looking stranger. And an open mind to be undiscriminating against it. I will not brag here about my decorative properties, because I find it shallow.

However.... I have been continuously in longterm relationships ever since I can remember. I was actually wanting to be by myself when I ran into my Moroccan, and if it wasn't for his persistence, I would never continue talking to him.
Anyways, what bothers me, is when people even use such epithets regarding others. "Obese, desperate, lonely, unattractive". Aren't these less fortunate women worthy of one's love and honesty anyways? Which side are you on?! Plus, nobody ages worse than these once handsome MENA studs :P

There is no need to judge me, I know whom I am. I do not juggle my values and priorities according to any men. I create my own situations and I'm mostly happy. I appreciate every day, my freedom, family, friends. I stand my own legs. I was willing to share these things with my Moroccan, instead all we shared at the end was his misery. I was learning Arabic, perfecting my French, thinking how to arrange us to be together with least damage to our individual goals, while he did... nothing. Just sat there, either repeating exaggerated love phrases or applying pressure in the most sneaky, toxic ways. I realized we were lacking balance and decided to leave. And don't get me wrong, it was a painful separation from the romantic part of me that believed we could be a perfect match (after a million sacrifices to fix his problems). This forum was my only support. Luckily for me, he later proved all of your predictions to be correct and I have no untold future to regret anymore. So I'd say, don't sacrify what you can't afford, but also know when it's you who is being greedy. Money is not a litmus paper. Loss is not always counted in dollar bills. If he asks for it that's a dead give away. But if he doesn't, it's not proving his honesty. Mine paid for everything he invited me to, but I have a feeling secret commissions applied to everything else. And even if it's him leaving everything behind just for you, that might too become an unbearable weight for your future together.

I have a life. But I like to pass on favors I received in life. I am in debt with the women on this forum. And seriously, I have an obligation to my country. My ancestors did not spill blood to build it, neither did I. I made a promise that neither I nor my relatives will rely on American tax payers money. I'm surprised how unpopular such consideration is. I have nothing against immigrants, but some of them are more constructive than others... Perhaps we should verify ourselves which kind we are about to bring in.

I can be happy for others. But let me be the judge of what I think of your happy story. If this was a forum for people with weight problem, would you be here cheering how slim you are? Lets be respectful of those who need to open up in a personal matter. I hope for all of you to be happy some day.

Much Love
Shömi

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