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Jessie Plz don't make this an attack forumReader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men Submitted by Jordana Ghannam-Ahmed (United States), Aug 27, 2016 at 23:43 Jessie, don't take this the wrong way Bc jam not wishing to come across as demeaning or belittling of u, nor am I doubting ur intelligence. Cynthia is only trying to help I have never seen her give anything but sincere and valuable advice on here and u don't need to throw her experience at her as a put down in order to somehow make ur experience superior. I can't imagine u would be on this forum and stating the things u are if u truly had this magical Cinderella story-the reality speaks for itself. And there's no shame in having doubts or made a bad call or admitting it-that's what this forum is largely for and about and there's no shortage of women who have been suckered and many of them are fully functioning, intelligent and probably berry attractive women . Before u go on the attack on me or my marriage for being here, let me just tell u MY story so u don't have to assume anything. I actually found this site on accident while searching for funny memes about middle eastern guys to send to my brother (he's not married doesn't want to. And we joke that it's because of his peculiar ways) once I began reading it I kept reading and called my girlfriend from Egypt over to read and get her opinion as well. Bc I am a middle eastern woman (I'm Palestinian and Syrian, my mom was born in USA but grew up in Damascus and my dad received assylum in the USA in 1984), I am Muslim, and I am married to and have children with an Egyptian man, was raised very traditionally but in the west-I felt that my personal firsthand knowledge could be of help in some of the cases since sometimes women may doubt the opinions and motivations of a western woman or even their own families. I am completely objective tho o do not know these women and would have no reason to steer them wrongly one way or the other-but I am a woman and I will support other women and mothers in the world regardless. I am also privy to much of what these guys talk about behind closed doors and their honest feelings as I have 4 brothers all but one of which who live in Palestine, and one is attending school on turkey. And have male Arab friends who share insight that I laugh off but may be important to women seeking relationships with these men. I have no concerns about my own husband or marriage and I am proof their are good ones on every culture, I am far from the only one too. So I don't like to see women becoming totally jaded and prejudiced against all middle eastern or Arab men because of the bad behavior of a few bad seeds. U won't see me talk much about my marriage on here except to indicate what courting and marriage should lool like in this culture when a woman is loved and respected. Because there isn't much to say when everything is cool, I don't neendvalidaton from anyone but me and my family. But by sharing my experiences and the cultural mores I can hopefully give them useful insight and help them to use good judgement and seek love in real life organic encounters and not via online chat rooms and random friend requests from attractive strangers. That being said, if u feel these women trying to help u are all envious old washed out duds, why u ask for their advice and input? Why not just keep quiet and carry on with ur amazing relationship? And why do u feel the need to separate urself from them by defending ur relationship so aggressively? It's clear from ur comments that ur relationship isn't an evenly balanced one, and that ur love interest doesn't have honest intentions. Regardless of whether or not u have obliged him. If he asks u for money and u say no, does that make the fact that he asked u for money any less uncouth? It may indicate u don't give in easily but it still makes him a POS no different. Same with sex and everything else-ots not ur response that gives legitimacy to the relationship; it's his approach to a woman that he purports to care about and have serious ambitions with. I've said it before but ill say it again, an decent Arab man would give his left nut before he'd ask or even accept money or payment from a female!! (even at a restaurant or for gifts she is buying electively-anything in his presence) it's just the WAY it is, if he doesn't have incredible shame and aversion to it by nature, be suspicious be very suspicious. Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments". Reader comments (21923) on this item
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All materials by Daniel Pipes on this site: © 1968-2024 Daniel Pipes. daniel.pipes@gmail.com and @DanielPipes Support Daniel Pipes' work with a tax-deductible donation to the Middle East Forum.Daniel J. Pipes (The MEF is a publicly supported, nonprofit organization under section 501(c)3 of the Internal Revenue Code. Contributions are tax deductible to the full extent allowed by law. Tax-ID 23-774-9796, approved Apr. 27, 1998. For more information, view our IRS letter of determination.) |