If your legs aren't broken.....

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Oct 10, 2015 at 22:19

Why keep coming back to the doctor?

I have to laugh at the irony.

Given the time stamps between your response to my comment, Amy, you seemed very eager to respond.

Do you care that much about what I think even when you laugh at me, Amy?

Not that long ago you were taking a position that I was on here "too much", but now that I've stayed away for a while (not intentionally) you are writing an extensive post to me and inviting me to come here "as much as I need to".

You missed the point, Amy. If you're going to be on here, you may as well make the most of it...As I said, people don't just stumble on here by accident, and those who are in secure relationships don't really need to the kind of attention you seek/like from me...

Truly I do take most of what you said at face value, as far as your altruistic intentions and goodwill. Of course I don't agree with all your views, that's unlikely to change.

Well, Amy, experience is a good teacher. You can clearly see it on here with women who resolutely defend their lovers, get scammed, lied to, or whatever----the usual drama let's call it, and then say how these men are all bad.

Let's hope that doesn't happen in your case.

But having views, and thinking you know something about my personal life, that's entirely two different things.

Amy, I've observed that people give out more than they realize, especially when they are bragging about something like a relationship....

And as it happens, again you are wrong in your perceptions and assumptions in that area.

You seem to have a picture that I was just another heartbroken divorcee, emotionally vulnerable and prime for someone to manipulate. Well, that's way off.

Is it? It's obvious you went into a quick marriage and you admit to it later on, Amy....

I only changed my mind after seeking Allah's guidance by istikhara.

Now, be careful Amy! The "it's want God wants" has been used before to justify questionable relationships....

I was there, I lived and felt and knew what I knew, that's simply all there was to it. And no amount of outside observation is going to change the truth of it. I do understand why you suggest "discerning the truth of the relationship". I did that too, in my own way, by seeking Allah after assessing the situation myself. We westerners are socialized to believe we have to dig deep and figure things out thoroughly ourselves before going forward.

You're writing this past tense, but you searched on here after that. Why?

There are exceptions to everything. So all that talk about "helping people in situations like mine", well, there is no situation that needs help here in my world. Yes I agree with you that there are women in bad situations that need help and guidance to avoid worse outcomes. To those women, this forum helps, to be sure.

So then why come on here and care about what we think? Why is it so important to you, Amy? Why are you not enjoying your great and wonderful marriage instead of the spent time on here?

But for the women who are NOT in a bad situation, who have good foreign men on their sides, but are being spooked into questioning their relationship needlessly because no one is willing to acknowledge the exceptions and help women identify them- that is why I will continue to share my thoughts here...no matter how others take it or interpret it.

But you haven't seen that on here, have you? And what constitutes needless question between an American and a foreigner? You already said:

although I understand that many here see red flags just by virtue of someone being a foreigner),

So how could there be needless questioning?

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