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I don't mean to sound like I'm dismissing anyone's feelings!

Reader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men

Submitted by Sheila, Sep 5, 2018 at 19:48

I asked for opinions because this is an important subject when discussing Mena Men. I stated no offense to anyone. I'm only being honest about my opinion. You can love someone but being "in love" is completely different. It's very possible to love someone and not be "in love" with them. Statistics say you cannot be "in love" if you have never met in reality. The online world is very deceiving. People can be who they want to be behind the computer. I don't even think that it's being in love when you have only saw each other a few times. It takes time to really know someone. I felt like death about my ex Mena man but after time had passed and my deep wounds began to heal I realized I had not spent enough time with him to really know him and be in love with him. Online we fall in love with the good looks, hearing all the right words, making plans and promises. It's the most beautiful painting. I had been hurt terribly bad in a relationship right before I met my Mena man. He cheated on me!! I caught him with another woman at a convince store and they were at his car . I ripped his shirt right off him because I had given it to him for his birthday and I hit her in both eyes. I was so hurt and angry. I didn't care if they called the police. They didn't though. I developed a low self esteem and was a miserable human being. I met the Mena man online. He was gorgeous, full of sweetness and promises, we made many plans together. I saw him a couple of times and I think I was in la la land. My Mom died during this time. After 2 years he showed me who he truly was. When it was over and I had time to get over everything with him. I felt like I woke up. That's what it was like for me personally. When I met the man I'm with now and we have been together about everyday. After months had passed we both felt we love each other. We were friends before seeing each other. We still are waiting until next year to get married because we both have been through a lot and we both said we want to be sure it's going to work. When you have been hurt a lot it will cause doubt in the back of your mind at times. There's times we have said why are we waiting because we feel there's no way it would end. Then we remember we thought our other relationships were for keeps and they weren't. My ex Mena man could put on a great performance. I will say he was a good actor. You shouldn't be made to feel you have to give money or gifts to show your love. I didn't give very much and I'm glad I didn't. That's why I've said I can't complain about any material items I've lost. I was more angry about being lied to and used. I cried and cried. I felt like my world was at the end. One of my happiest days is when I rose above that dark cloud that had been hovering over me and I realized the truth about all of it. Also realizing I was over it! I shared this because it's what honestly happen to me and it's my honest opinion too. I'm sorry if I offend anyone because that's not my intention at all . I don't expect everyone to agree with my opinion. I just think it is something to look at and take under consideration when it's an online relationship. Again no offense or disrespect is meant. Take care and God Bless :-)

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Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".

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Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".

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