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to Anonymous womanReader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men Submitted by Laurra (Netherlands), Aug 25, 2015 at 05:45 Hi Anonymous, Usually it is very difficult to test them. This guy sounds very intelligent and he has already been a step ahead of you by advising you to search the internet for bad stories. It is a way to make you think he is different. You will not find out his true colours easily, unless you spend A LOT of time with him. So don't marry him if you haven't spent a lot of time together. Quick marriage is a huge red flag. He says he is ok if you don't want to, but it is still pressure, and weird as you have never met. I am not here to tell you if he is a scammer or not. But I just want you to realise that even this guy wants to leave Egypt. They all do. It's their long-term goal and they will propose living in Egypt to make you feel he will live anywhere and that it is about you. If you haven't met in real life and you are already talking marriage and kids, then that is a huge red flag. Also, him introducing you to his family doesn't mean a thing. The family sees Westerners as means to an end to get to a Western country and money will flow to them. Even if he says his family is rich and doesn't need money. The apartment is there because it is common for the father to build apartments for his son to live in with his (Egyptian) wife and kids. This is something they need to provide to be able to marry a girl there. I don't really understand the concept of falling in love over the internet, so please be careful by saying you are in love. You need to meet first and get to know each other for that. If he really is true, and wants to be with you, because you get on well, and if he will stay with you, I urge you to look into islam and think if this is a way you can live your life. Because your kids will be muslim, no doubt about that. Even if he says now that your kids can chose their own religion, it will not be like that. I also want you to think about how you can trust somebody that easily. Arabic people don't trust someone on their words because words cannot be trusted in their culture, only actions. This is why over there they want to see actions before they marry someone. And that is why these guys search Western women, who only need some loving words. They don't marry just based on promises. Look into the marriage contract that they have over there. A non-muslim spouse does not have any rights! Don't sign anything in Arabic! The last thing I want to tell you is that the cultural differences are so big, that even if it was love, it would be very very hard to bridge those differences. I urge you to spend more time with him, talk to people, read up on islam and don't take those beautiful words seriously. Egyptian men are the best with words and you will believe them. Until one day the whole fairytale turns to shit, because they go for something better when it comes along. Or they make you feel like you don't matter because you are a woman. They can get us with love and sweet words, the arabic woman, will only commit if there are real actions. And in the end you will never be Arabic, you are older than him and that counts against you too. If you can live like an arabic woman, obeying him and deal with his moodiness and the fact that he will always be above you, then you can live this life. But to be honest, I dont think any Western woman can. Sorry if the message is a bit messy. I don't have much time. But I really want to warn you. I thought my Egyptian was different. He is also educated and very sweet and committed in the beginning. But when he didn't get his way, he changed. I have a son with him and I have been to hell and back and I don't wish this upon anyone. Please be warned. I have spoken to so many women and all stories are the same. I don't know of any couple that survived a marriage like this. And on the internet, even less chance. Good luck. xxx Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments". Reader comments (21923) on this item
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