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Need advice on online boyfriend of Pakistani origin but living in QatarReader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men Submitted by Katie (Philippines), Feb 5, 2015 at 01:18 I met this guy thrugh a dating website last January 1st 2015. We had a very nice conversation which moved on to phone calls and video chat. Initially, I had my doubts after reading numerous stories about online scams but after a while, the doubts started to fade. This guy is over 10 years younger than me, he's 34 years old. He told me about his past: was in a pre-arranged marriage at a young age but didnt last. His last relationship was with a Muslim girl who lived in Malaysia. He said he moved to Malaysia for 2 years to be with her but she was not the same person he met online and that their relationship was controlled by the mother of the girl. He said his 2 years with her were a living hell. He claims she cheated on him but he never confronted her about it. He now lives in Qatar, works in a military base and goes home during his days off to his sister's house. After our intense conversations, I felt a rush of feelings for him because we shared so many principles about life and we also had a lot in common. Our religions are different, I am Catholic and he is Muslim. He says he does not practice the faith and respect all religions. He also told me that should we ever marry, he will not ask me to convert and I asked him if he would. He said that he cannot because he will be put to death. He said he is willing though to write in the marriage contract he is Catholic but for it to be legal, we also need to marry the Muslim way. While marriage is still far off, I have a few concerns mainly, he needs to come to my country and meet my mom, friends and my siblings. He said the process for the military takes about 2 months to file a leave - I have no idea if this is true. Another thing is that he has not introduced me to his sister who he says he's very close to. I asked for her picture and he said picture taking of women is not proper so even he doesnt have her picture. He calls me when he's home and has infact introduced me to his nephews and niece via Skype. The kids asked something in Arabic which i did not understand so he told me they asked who i was and he said I'm their aunt. He said his dad and brothers are still in Pakistan. His mom passed away when he was living in Malaysia. While stupid me here is proud of him, telling my friends I met this guy, he says he has only told a friend or 2 about me. I asked him why doesnt he tell his sister and he said once he knows when he can go on leave, he will tell her his plans to come here and tell his sister about me. He said there is not point in saying anything now since he still does not when he's coming. As the weeks went by, I fell for him and he likewise claims to have fallen inlove for me. He says he wants to meet me face to face first and see if we can really build a future together. He also said he's looking to move to my country - Philippines and start a business and buy a condo. Now, these are all just words and till it comes to fruition, I have doubts but as each day passes, my emotions are getting deeper. If anyone can tell me answers to the following: 1. He cannot introduce me to his friends because its not done in their culture. He said if I meet them online, it will be ackward for them and for me and they would think I am interested in them. He said also that Muslim men do not introduce their girlfriends and wives to their male friends. 2. is it forbidden for him to introduce me to his sister even via Skype? I have a nagging feeling he isnt telling me the whole truth because when he's home we video chat but when his sister arrives he needs to get off the phone because she will get mad if he doesnt go outside to greet her when she arrives. When this happens, we end up chatting instead of talking. 3. Is there any way to know if he does this to other girls? once I checked his online profile in the dating site and saw his friends list. I questioned why did he have another profile and he said its because he plays this game offered by the site and accumulates points. Since I met him, I dont really go to that site anymore but when I did - last night, I diiscovered I can no longer access his friends list. I saw however comments on his pictures from a girl who posted "yummy" 3 days ago and it really freaked me out. I checked the girl's profile and saw she's also in my country and is in an open relationship - with who i dont know. I also saw his last online in that site was an hour after I had checked his page. I asked him the other day if he thinks i should deactivate my profile since I dont go to the site anymore and he said its up to me. He says he trusts me. One thing I think is true is that he really is in the military because I am able to check his location when he says he's there coz all his messages have the location on. Just like when he says he's home. Can someone, anyone let me know if this situation of mine has been experienced? And if anyone thinks this can work out because I really am hoping it does. Many thanks. Katie Submitting....
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