To Becs on Marriage Pointers
Reader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men
Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Dec 20, 2012 at 21:44
Hi.. Normally age would not cause concern but as I have said before in a Muslim culture it is very much an issue believe me I see this every day.. You have to remember I hear and see all the things you explain and then eventually after years things change.. This is inevitable it's just whether or not you are willing to change for him.. I believe that is the challenge and sacrifice you have to maIf ye
Regardless of the culture, if you an older woman, especially one who is divorced with kids, you need to be careful about younger men period. Some of them are just looking for what they think (and frankly often is) an easy way to get laid, others just end up being like adopted sons.
You need to be there longer than just a few weeks holiday.. You need to see the real him.. It's the same as the uk really.. You would never marry or move in with someone until you could honestly say you know them.. Only when you live their lives can you be sure..
That's what it all comes down too. Most of the situations though you can tell that doesn't happen. Finances and immigration tend to be the biggest reasons, but the bottom line is that people who talk on-line really aren't sure. That is why they come on here.
I live in Egypt but my understanding they are very similar cultures and even though my bf is not a full practicing Muslim as I said if we ever had children then he has since advised of course they will be muslim and there is no discussion on that!
You may be surprised at how different how the cultures are. The scamming and lying tactics, however, have a similar pattern.
So if you are happy with that and happy living a far less privileged life then for sure take the plunge.. I just am trying to let you see how life can change over time.. I have friends here who are married and did so very quickly.. They love their husbands but now feel trapped and have changed so much of their lives they are lost..
That's the problem, especially with places like Sharm. Women may not be scammed in the VISA sense, but they aren't exactly living the high life and actually seem to be kind of miserable or just sleep-walking through life.
As Isis says often: Islam is very much a man's world.
And once married for sure life is then owned by your husband.. This is fact.. Simply some women are happy with this and if they are that is fine..
Well, some women on here have boasted about their advanced education and then say how they'd at least seem to consider or even be fine with being a second wife in the second or third world doing housechores. They haven't really come back to share validate their pre-conceived elation.
Depends on each person really.. Only you can make the decision. Just please don't commit to marry until you have given more time and longer visits.. What will you lose.. If he loves you he will wait.. Mine did.. I hope you understand the advice is just that and not negativity.. Good luck..
I'd say that's key, and I think that Iraqi fellow is trying to guilt Guest to a degree into marrying him.
Wanting to rush a marriage is a key warning sign, and if he gets pushy, something is up, something bad.
Trying to make someone be spontaneous is a old sales trick, because people are spontaneous tend to buy more into things.
Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".
Reader comments (11671) on this item
Comment on this item
You can help support Daniel Pipes' work by making a tax-deductible donation to the Middle East Forum. Daniel J. Pipes