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He moved out...

Reader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men
in response to reader comment: To Didi

Submitted by DIDI (France), Jun 9, 2019 at 08:59

Hi. Sorry for the week long absence. I've been alone, just trying to clear my head. And of course, crying my eyes out!

So I confronted him with everything. He appeared generally upset when I said I didn't think we were a good match and that he had treated me like I was worthless. I laid into him and surprisingly he didn't lose his temper and start shouting back.

I let him know I was no door mat or punching bag and that I deserve better. I also let him know I know they were all faking and just playing nice until he got his green card. which I will never apply for. I told him he might as well go and find a Moroccan woman. I let him know that I had overheard the conversation his Mom's cousin had with him when trying to convince him not to marry me and marry his daughter instead. After all, she is Moroccan, Muslim, much more beautiful, knows how to handle a Moroccan husband, and a European citizen, so she can get him residency quickly.

He just hung his head in shame and apologized. He said he never meant to hurt me, especially not physically. He said he saw that with his father and mother, but knows it's not right. He apologized for everything and said he tried to call it off bc he didn't want me to get hurt.

I said I was leaving. He said he'd leave instead, no reason for me to go to a hotel. He asked if I was keeping the baby. I said of course. He quietly packed his things. When he was leaving, he apologized again. I said I wasn't mad, but I was definitely hurt bc I really loved him. He told me that I probably wouldn't believe him, but he actually loved me too bc I was the most sincere person he'd ever met. I wished him well since I know he'll be married soon.

So for the next few days, I laid in bed crying. My mom and sister called frequently to talk and see when I'd be returning. And I've gotten many calls from his family also, none of which I answered. I did send messages saying he and I were done and all contact would be stopped.

Last night about 1am my phone rings. I don't answer or look at it. Another call, again I ignore it. 3rd call and I finally decide to see who it is. It's him! He's also sent multiple messages asking if we can talk. I answered and asked what he wanted. He's noticeably been drinking (which I've only seen him do 2x) and says he can't walk away. He says he's not a good guy, he knows it. He says he doesn't deserve me, he knows it. He says he doesn't care what anyone else thinks.. he really wants to be a family with me and this baby. He says he'll do anything to change and prove to me he is serious. I told him I didn't understand why he was bothering me. He has a beautiful Moroccan virgin who actually wants to marry him and can give him permanent residence and his family will accept her. He says he just can't walk away from me and his child, he loves us too much. He asked me to think about it and give him a chance to prove himself. He aaked me to move with him bc he has decided to take the job he was offered so he can provide for us. He said he'd do whatever it took to prove he's willing to change. He said it was cool if I go back to the US to think about it. But begged me not to give up on him.

I told him I was absolutely going to the US in 3 days to stay with my mom. And I'll think about what I want and see what he does in the meantime.

Submitting....

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Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".

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