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Making Excuses and Using Other Relationships to Bolster ClaimsReader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Mar 16, 2015 at 23:36 In response to your comment for the first time in my life I actually don't have many doubts. I would be a fool and lying to you if I told you I didn't have any!! You should NEVER enter into a marriage with doubts. The fact that you concede you'd be a fool and a liar if you didn't have any is nowhere near sufficient for a good marriage. The fact is getting married is a huge step in life and one I take very seriously! It is a huge step, and you should take it seriously. And you can start by acknowledging you don't completely trust him and take a good, hard at it instead of defending it on here. But that has nothing to do with my future husband being Egyptian or Muslim or anything like that. It has to do with the fact that you are on here writing man-defense posts and worrying about who likes/dislikes your posts when you ought to be enjoying your relationship. What this tells me, Aisha, is that you don't know what he is doing. It's just a life's change and One that doesn't appear for the better… I am putting my trust into another human being and giving them my heart which is scary for any of us. No one likes to get hurt. If you that getting married to someone is scary, you DEFINITELY should not be getting married. Marriage isn't about fear, it's about trust and total giving. Under these circumstances, Aisha, I would advise you not to marry this man even if he were a US citizen who was in your same age range (which I am still unclear on here) and I converted to Islam when I was very young but I went away for awhile too. Being a Muslim will not necessarily shield you from Muslim scammers and liars. God has blessed me with good and bad and I have seen things in this life that would make you shudder. That doesn't make your relationship real. In fact, every time you say things like this, I'm more convinced it's a lie and a scam. Frankly, if you trusted him, you wouldn't need to chalk it up to God (Allah). You have faith in God, which is good, but I don't think deep down you trust your partner. And you shouldn't. God gave you a brain and instincts. Use them! I work in a field with people where I see the worst in them and the best the side of humans where they help a complete stranger. Aisha, your experience as a counselor will not necessarily prepare you for this. The world full of good and bad everywhere but I have to say more good then bad! So the fact that you think the world has good people means that your relationship is just fine? Why, Aisha, do you have to keep on bringing in other people? Can't your relationship stand on its own merit? I had my own personal experience of living in the same house with someone for many years and I did not know the monster I lived beside. And no this person was not a Muslim or Arab and I knew his film very well and him. Then how would you know it about a man who lives in another country? I wish I had a euro every time someone in the West defending a relationship said "oh, you know, there's good and bad everywhere; I'm sure I've got a good one." The thing about the "good ones" is they stand all on their own. They don't need to be defended or paraded around the internet for all to see. This brings me to my point, the only sure thing we have as humans is our faith in God. That's it, we need to not be fold and look for signs but in the end that's all we have whatever faith you come from. I happen to be a Muslim and so I call my God Allah which is just God in Arabic same Word Christian Muslims use too! As for the reason I was on this site, well of coarse my friend called me and said oh my you can't marry an Egyptian man because you should read what I have read on the Internet, so I looked. I found I'm glad she did refer you. But that changes nothing. Your relationship is still highly suspect, Aisha. So let me get this straight: You find one comment that is deemed highly suspect out of testimony after testimony on a forum that is now entering its ninth year of activity, and you think your friend is wrong? Amy's comment refreshing in a sea of negativity and the most logical of the bunch. That's almost funny. Amy has her own issues to work out, and like you, wouldn't even be on here if she were so sure. My guess is that you two are both older than your male partners. And why would you need support from Amy or anyone else if you trusted him? What does it matter what we think, Aisha? It's obviously very important to you. I am sorry for whatever happened to you to have so much doubt. Getting lied to and scammed will do that. I always think it's interesting and dare I say amusing how man-defense post authors have to try and make us the villains, the crazy ones or the ones who are just plain wrong. After all, what do we know? Sadly, we know the hard way. Aisha, you are well on your way towards uncertainity at best and total disaster at worst. Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments". Reader comments (21923) on this item
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