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The Traits, Going After Married ManReader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Feb 7, 2014 at 21:43 I have read through the majority of your stories and I have one not unlike most. Bottom line is I fell head-over heels completely in love with, not just a married man with kids, but a foreigner in every sense of the word- Muslim. Before meeting him through a mutual recreational activity, I had never spent any time with a Muslim. (I now know this is because they are generally dissuaded from associating with non-Muslims) We never had sex but he stirred my passion more than any other.) We are no longer speaking/texting/seeing one another. It is a long story but it was ultimately something I needed to do. Yes, you did need to do that and you need to delete his contact information from your IMs, phone or whatever. This would most likely not end well for you. Just because a man makes your heart flutter doesn't mean you need to be off to the races. Yeah, dating a foreigner with a fancy accent can be "fun.". So can trying to get what you can have (a married man). That can also be "fun" too. Good relationships are not based on satisfying every little contemplation or feeling we have. That is, I think, a fundamental issue demonstrated on here time and time again. For one thing, there's no way a lot of women on here would be indulging in so much uncertainty with a pot-bellied, balding, and/or overweight peer. And the ones who would---I'd wonder if they were really ready for a solid, committed relationship. That being said, if things were different, I would definately have married him- even though he was already married and had a young family because THAT is how much I loved him. (and still do If i am being honest with myself) Then you would be selling yourself short. If he was willing to cheat on his wife, what makes you think he wouldn't cheat on you? What makes you so special? And if you were a second wife, what do you think your place would be? Numero uno, for the outsider/newcomer???? And Is that really love? To me, you just seemed to falling for him because he's skilled at talking to women and is different. But you need to move on. Go hang out with other people, treat yourself, visit family. Don't sit around and stew over this. So, I have taken the time to think about what it was that made him so attractive- He had a warm smile and was of average looks. I was drawn to his 5 times a day prayers. That was an attractive quality to me. I loved his accent and his intelligence. He was full of compliments. He was so chivalrous. It seemed he thought of me even before himself. He was a good listener. That's how it pretty much always starts. Do you think women would be drawn in if they guy said that he was really a bad person, or expected you to sit at home all day with no male friends covered up the whole time? How many college educated First World women do you think would go for that? It's the same thing with women who scam men, but the difference is just in the minor details. He had a boyish way about him that brought out the nurturing side of me- I am not sure if this was because he was not raised in the states or if it was part of who he is. He was an emotional man. He was not afraid to show if he was upset or hurting. He made me feel protected and loved in a way no other has. All are techniques to pull the stings of your heart, whether the man realizes it or not. I don't mind men and women playing the dating game and I think there's always natural power struggles and mysteries, but.... Be careful who you fall for! I am uncertain if this was just him, or if this is the result of his faith or his culture (or combo of all 4). It seems a lot of others have said similar things about their experiences and it leads me to believe that perhaps American men are missing some of these old-fashioned qualities which I found very endearing in him. Perhaps that is why we are so charmed by them. That's pretty much spot on, but I don't know that Islam (at least directly) advocates for flirting Thoughts? Are we missing something from Western men that makes us vulnerable to them? First World men are in many cases awful at dating skills and relating to women. Such men in the First World really don't seem to get the difference between ATTRACTION and just being close or a good friend to a woman, to paraphrase dating guru Marius Panzarella. We could probably teach a semester long course on that. In part, I think it is because the media puts out these false relationship situations that too many folks are influence. Submitting....
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