Moroccan man, New Zealand, On-line Dating
Reader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men
Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Dec 28, 2012 at 22:34
The most important thing to understand is that international, on-line dating is a real headache that often leads to heartache.
If you read through the posts on here, you'll notice that most haven't turned out so great. A smattering few will insist what they have is good through clenched teeth but leave clear indications that something is not right.
The problem is that all men who seek to scam, lie or cheat sound genuine (or at least know how to communicate with women).
If they weren't genuine and nice up front, the jerks wouldn't get the girl in most cases.
I think all this hassle you will have to go through to get to Morocco and back is a big waste of time. It's nice that he is offering you to stay with his family, but I have to say I find that rather odd. Most people would be very cautious about letting an international person whom they've never met into their home. I just wonder:
1) Is his family REALLY okay with that?
2) If they are, it sounds suspicious.
There are so many reasons why this is a bad idea. He could be a liar, a scammer, or someone who just wants to brag about being with an international woman. Believe it or not, having someone different as a romantic partner is terribly important to some people.
The situation you will constantly find yourself in is really that you can't bring yourself to trust him, because you can't interact with him as often in person. Romantic communication is very difficult on-line and even if you both were completely honest with each other (this never really happens), you're getting maybe a third or less of what you would get in real life, and seeing him in person a few times a year won't cut it, not with those wonderful feminine instincts, and it shouldn't.
On-line dating with people from other countries does not entail trust, and it shouldn't. It can be dangerous, but mostly, it turns out to be a big headache and disappointment, not to mention costly and a waste of time.
In over a decade of on and off on-line dating, it's important to understand one thing: a lot of people are on there are not quite who they say they are. People who need to turn to the internet for such attention are often mentally ill, have some kind of social problem or may just feel desperate for one reason or another. With both men and women, a lack of confidence is also an issue. More colourful motives (often leading to disastrous results) might be the desire to go out of one's way to find someone who just because they are different.
I would strongly suggest that you find people to date in person. If you want to use the internet, it's best to find local men you can interact with, but even then you have to be careful of the issues I just mentioned.
Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".
Reader comments (13076) on this item
Comment on this item
Support Daniel Pipes' work with a tax-deductible donation to the Middle East Forum. Daniel J. Pipes